You know, that guy who crushes up cars and calls it art? Anyone? Well, regardless of your sorry knowledge of the history of contemporary art, I'll dish the hot details anyway. Christian Bale will pilot this jet-powered hunk of twisted metal in "Batman Begins," the Bat series prequel which will be released next June. The formerly sleek lines have been replaced with rugged features suggesting part sport utility vehicle, part military sled, and part swamp buggy. Batmobiles have traditionally been inspired by the shapes found in Batman's mask and cape, suggesting that in the new movie, B-man will look like a leper that mated with junkyard debris. The reason for releasing info about the Batmobile so soon? Gotta get started selling toys ASAP.


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