April Foolery: BMW announces anti-dog piss alloy wheels


The concept of "Man's Best Friend" applies only when Rover is romping in the backyard catching frisbees or keeping your feet warm at the end of the couch. As soon as Fido chews up your penny loafers or, heaven forbid, opens up his main drain on a prized possession, the extension of friendship between Homo Sapien and canine is rescinded. BMW has invented a new system called Canine Repellent Alloy Protection (CRAP) that should prevent Lassie from leaking all over its owner's most prized possession, the Bimmer in the driveway. CRAP uses the existing EfficientDynamics Brake Energy Regeneration systems on many BMWs to store up electric energy known as Rim Impulse Power (RIP). When a poodle aims its peter at one of your Bimmer's shiny alloy wheels, a small electric charge will cross the stream and give Fluffy a tough lesson in respecting other people's property. Ingenious, really.

[Source: BMW, Metro.co.uk]


PRESS RELEASE

BMW's Canine Repellent Alloy Protection

The latest innovation to stop foul play on the street

BMW has announced the first details of the new Canine Repellent Alloy Protection system. Designed to stop dogs fouling against the sparkling alloys of new BMW cars, the innovative Canine Repellent Alloy Protection system (C.R.A.P.) is the latest offering in the BMW EfficientDynamics programme.

Using the EfficientDynamics Brake Energy Regeneration system, energy that would normally have been lost during engine over-run and during braking is harnessed as Rim Impulse Power (R.I.P.) and stored for future use. Whenever a dog tries to relieve itself on the wheel of a suitably-equipped BMW, a small and relatively painless electric shock is immediately administered to the animal, thus deterring it from future fouling.

Dr Hans Zoff, Head of Automotive Security from BMW AG, said; "Research shows that most BMW customers like to keep their cars clean and dog fouling is a constant irritant. Not only does the Canine Repellent Alloy Protection system support this aim, but it does so using energy created through the EfficientDynamics programme. Beauty through engineering perfection – our philosophy in a wheel nut."

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