Foreskin Removal: Dartz Prombron drops the whale penis

Dartz Prombron luxury SUV from Russia

You probably heard about the Dartz Prombron recently, the ultra-luxury armored SUV from Russia that would feature, among other ne plus ultra materials, leather pulled from whale penis foreskin. Why whale foreskin? Someone told them it was the best so they jumped on it. Unfortunately, the attraction didn't last very long. They have issued a release saying they will release the penis from their options list. Apparently the company has had a rethink on their choice of interior materials after receiving negative responses to their announcement from Greenpeace, the World Wildlife Fund, and even Pamela Anderson.

Personally, we think this might be more of a reaction to the new anti-whaling boat that the Sea Shephards have picked up for the upcoming season of Whale Wars: The newly rechristened Ady Gil, a 90 km/h semi-submersible tri-hull that holds the record for global circumnavigation. Whatever the reason, Dartz has Bobbitted the penis from the vehicle's spec sheet. In a brilliant press release that we couldn't possibly put into any better words, the company announced the change. Follow the jump to read the verbiage for yourself. Thanks for the tips, everyone!

[Source: Dartz via The Star, Jameslist]


One month ago DARTZ presented uberluxury armored car with whale penis interior - PROMBRON' (ex.RussoBaltique), lot of people name this car as DARTZ.KOMBAT. As the world's resonance was very huge and DARTZ got lot of angry e-mails from Greenpeace, WWF and also Pamela Anderson, DARTZ make strong decision to stop their plans regarding such interior.

"We have no any ideas to kill the whale or something like that. All we want - to make just luxury car. Real luxury car which will be world number one car. Our brand was started at 1869 when in Riga was opened Coach Factory or Russo Baltiysky Vagonnij Zavod - PBVZ, and first products was luxury train coaches. At 1907 was made a decision to open Car Department, and at 1909 first car left factory - the name of this car was RussoBalt. This was luxury and sport cars. At 1911 specially for Monaco Rally car got french style name - RussoBaltique. At 1912 factory made world first 4 x 4 wheel drive car, and at 1914 - armored car. All we want to unite luxury and armoring traditions of RussoBalt factory in one car, which brand celebrated 100 years now. At 1922 RussoBalt was renamed to PROMBRON' (ex.RussoBalt).

We just looking for most expensive products for this car - and that's why we choosed whale penis leathure when we checked it is most of most. After wave of protest we realised our mistake and make a decision not to use natural leathure at all. We will focus on world most advanced nanotechnologies to achieve interior highest quality using artificial materials which also was never used for cars. We want to tell our hello to all whales: "Our Sea Brothers! We all know that earth are stand on three whales - we will keep You live! We don't Earth fall down to Ocean!"

Also we make a decision to pay more attention to glass and on our new car model we will use glass which will be made by special technology - from artificial grown chrystals, which will be gold sputerred to cut IR and UV rays, which make driving inconvinient when sun shine.

Best regards,
Leonard F. Yankelovich

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