Despite previous rumors to the contrary, BMW CEO Helmut “Hanke” Panke now insists that the spinning props will not
produce a minivan (digitally invented at right), and instead will pursue vehicles that are simply roomier. One option
could provide a “comfortable business-lounge environment” (does that include highballs?) with three rows of seating,
while another strategy might be an SAV/wagon platform with coupe characteristics, not unlike Mercedes’ R-Class. Panke
says the new whip “is not a people mover,” because “any BMW brand solution will not just offer space.” That’s right, it
will also offer you the chance to be ridiculed by your jealous and worse-off family members who think a Dodge Caravan
can “get the kids to soccer practice just the same.” Cretins.
BMW may go with sport wagon over minivan
Despite previous rumors to the contrary, BMW CEO Helmut “Hanke” Panke now insists that the spinning props will not produce a minivan (digitally invented at right), and instead will pursue vehicles that are simply roomier. One option could provide a “comfortable business-lounge environment” (does that include highballs?) with three rows of seating, while another strategy might be an SAV/wagon platform with coupe characteristics, not unlike Mercedes’ R-Class. Panke says the new whip “is not a people mover,” because “any BMW brand solution will not just offer space.” That’s right, it will also offer you the chance to be ridiculed by your jealous and worse-off family members who think a Dodge Caravan can “get the kids to soccer practice just the same.” Cretins.