After getting over-caffeinated, I hopped into both cars to argue (with myself) about the pluses and minuses of the two. The LX is only available with a manual and the 2.0-liter, and the Touring comes solely with the CVT and 1.5 turbo. One is bare-bones and the other is loaded with features.
And yes, before you ask, things get a little more complicated for 2017, since you can now get the 1.5-liter turbo four with a manual on the coupe's mid-range EX-T trim level; the turbo engine is available on the sedan as well and standard on hatches. But the cars here still represent the bookends of the Civic coupe range, and the Civic lineup in general.
What did I learn? It turns out "carbos" was just code for "sugar" in the Surge slogan. You should watch the video above for my thoughts on which Civic is right for which buyer.