News of the Saturn Ion's ignominious demise have been met with cheers in the street, as it was truly the brand's last embarassing model. Though most of us eagerly await the arrival of the Saturn Astra from Opel, there is one person in the galaxy who still holds the dear departed Ion close to his heart... Tek Jansen of Alpha Squad 7! If you're not familiar with Tek Jansen, then you don't watch the Colbert Report on Comedy Central and should therefore be chastised. A few days ago Stephen Colbert introduced Episode 5 of Stephen Colbert Presents: Stephen Colbert's Alpha Squad 7 – Operation: Homecoming's Doorstep: Cat on a Luniharp, a Tek Jansen Adventure. Despite having deinduced the cardioid thrusters on the Bizlarnian Battle Wedge, Tek's only response to being fired upon by the enemy ship is, "Saturn Ion!" Seriously, I've laughed at this clip all day, which means either that I'm working too hard and have gone crazy or Stephen Colbert is a comedy genius.