It's a good thing our readers are using e-mail. After carrying a hefty load of holiday cards to TheCarConnection.com world headquarters, our mail carrier would be in for medical leave if he had to hoist a sack with all the entries we've received for the Wild, Weird and Wacky Street Names Contest. The offering from Ray Nipper, Pity Me Street, sums up the situation we're going to face when it comes time to pick our winners.
Ray reminds us that the United States has no monopoly on strange street names. Indeed, over the years, we've discovered some of the oddest in the United Kingdom. Not surprising, perhaps, that the home of Harry Potter would sport the street name Muggleswick. But can anyone explain what a Snod is, and why kids would be playing near its Edge?
Some parts of the country seem to specialize in odd names. New Jersey pays homage to its original natives with towns like Hohokus and Secaucus and streets sharing those names. Yet it's hard to dispute that some of the strangest names show up down south. Michael Hokanson tells us the tale of Chicken Gristle Road in Granbury, Texas:
"The name always gets a laugh whenever anyone sees or hears it. The problem for the county is that because the name is so unusual everyone keeps stealing the signs. Since I have lived here (almost five years) the county has had to replace the signs no less than five times (there are two, one at each end of the road). I have even come home to find tourists standing under the sign to take pictures."
We've found that New England is also an outpost of peculiarity, at least when it comes to street names. Karen Jochinson discovered Noisy Hole Road in Mashpee, Mass., which may be a shoo-in should we have a strange town names contest sometime. Over in Bedford Hills, N.Y., Sal found Succabone Road. We can't even tell you how many Licks we've heard about, such as Bone Lick and Deer Lick. In New York's Putnam County, we have Bullet Hole Road, which some might expect to find instead in the South Bronx.
We wish Duane Cross could have delivered a pic of Jack Ass Hill Road in Littleton, Colo. But after seeing the way the telephone pole leans in the shot provided by Terry Liilcrapp, of Glenn Mills, Pa., we believe this really is a Helluva Hill Lane.
Sex and religion seem to play a disproportionate role in the entries we've received so far. Matthew Graves reminds us why they call it the Bible Belt down in Hyden, Kentucky, where he discovered Hell for Certain Road.
On the other hand, the local Alabama Road Commission must've been a bit confused when they tried to figure out what to call this quiet little lane. As our reader explains:
"This Ain't It Road dead-ends into a lake where our cabin, recently bulldozed to make ready for a new home, was once located. Before the county actually built roads with names down to the lake, people would get lost, end up at the cabin asking if this was where so and so lived, and the cabin owner and neighbors who lived down this area would holler back, 'This ain't it.' When the county decided to improve the roads as well as name them all, the folks who lived in the area went to the courthouse and asked that their road be named 'This Ain't It.' Their request was granted."
As we said, picking a winner isn't going to be easy, not when we get entries like this one from Cinad Anderton, from Lake Havasu, Ariz. "The worst in town," she tells us, "is BROOMRAPE. I can't even imagine why someone would buy a house on that street!!!" But would you feel much better living in one of Lake Havasu's many retirement homes bordering the intersection of Stroke and Acoma?