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Click above to view the video after the jump

You know what's wrong with kids today? We don't either, but one thing we're sure of is that they just don't read enough P.J. O'Rourke. True, Republicanism has fallen totally out of favor among today's youngsters, but that stuff is cyclical. Like when Nixon swept into the 80th Congress -- the GOP was all the rage then. And the Newt Gingrich led 104th Congress was pretty popular for a few minutes back in the Lewinkski-charged Nineties.

Anyhow, O'Rourke is a great Republican. Our favorite, in fact. You all should sit down and read P.J. to your children as bedtime stories. Might we suggest a passage from his 1978 classic, "How to Drive Fast On Drugs While Getting Your Wing-Wang Squeezed and Not Spill Your Drink." Here's a taste:
Even more important than being drunk, however, is having the right car. You have to get a car that handles really well. This is extremely important, and there's a lot of debate on this subject – about what kind of car handles best. Some say a front-engined car; some say a rear-engined car. I say a rented car. Nothing handles better than a rented car. You can go faster, turn corners sharper, and put the transmission into reverse while going forward at a higher rate of speed in a rented car than in any other kind. You can also park without looking, and can use the trunk as an ice chest. Another thing about a rented car is that it's an all-terrain vehicle. Mud, snow, water, woods – you can take a rented car anywhere. True, you can't always get it back – but that's not your problem, is it?
See? As for why we dug this old chestnut up, may we suggest you make the jump and watch the video? P.J. would be so proud.

[Source: YouTube via AutoFiends | Image: Getty]

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    • 1 Second Ago
      • 5 Years Ago
      Wow. I'm not sure what to say about that video.

      I wanna say something along the lines of "A fool and his money are soon parted."
        • 5 Years Ago
        A fool and his money are soon partying.
      • 5 Years Ago
      Great way to ruin a site quick. Way to go Jonny!

      Snuggle up with your PJ somewhere else please - thanks, yeah keep moving.
      • 5 Years Ago
      PJ is the man. Did you see him taking the Phantom Drophead Coupe fishing in C/D last month? Seriously. Who drives a Phantom in waders and a panama? Love it. This video (while asinine in an amusing sort of way) sounds like just the sort of thing that PJ would get up to. John Phillips, too.
      • 5 Years Ago
      Man, I do love that exhaust note though.
      • 5 Years Ago
      Now available at Budget Rent a Car!!!
      • 5 Years Ago
      P.J. O'Rourke is a narcissistic blowhard. Next!
      • 5 Years Ago
      That is awesome!

      Nice to see someone using a car for fun.
      • 5 Years Ago
      Dear Jonny Liberalman,

      You're so cute. To bad you and your ilk will get b!$ch slapped in the mid-term elections. I guess history does repeat itself, doesn't it?

      Love 'n' Kisses!
        • 5 Years Ago

        It's very interesting that you suggest that "ALL the other polls conducted show the opposite results". If you follow this link you'll notice that Rassmussen is the only poll that shows Obama with below 50% approval rating. This includes Gallup, CNN, Fox News, Washington Post, Marist and CBS News.


        Which polls do you think I should be following that will make me concerned about how things are going? I think Obama is tackling tough issues and he's trying to clean up the mess left by Bush, which is exactly what he promised to do.

        • 5 Years Ago

        This is the same Washington Post who's latest poll on health care that said a majority were in favor of the public (government) option but surveyed 3 times as many Democrats than Republicans and independents. ALL the other polls conducted show the opposite results. You want to believe them? Go right ahead, knock yourself out. As the congress and Obama get lower and lower ratings, the media refuses to report it. You might think that all is well, but it isn't. The electorate is pissed off. The instensity of a groundswell is measured by the numbers of people involved that have never gotten involved in politics before. And that's what I'm seeing. People really are "mad as hell" and not taking it anymore this time. As for your 20% number, even if it were true it DOES NOT translate into 80% Democrats. There are many people who are tired of both parties and do not align themselves with either. But one thing is certain, they will vote against the incumbant in the next election. And who do you think stands the most to lose? Rassmussen and other (real) polsters have BO's approval at less than 50% - and falling. Congress less than 20%. Luck will not be needed. You can save this and see if what I said happens or not in about a year from now.

        As for not knowing the difference between to and too, I apologize that I don't have time at work to run my post thru a spell or grammar check like you. My reading abilities and comprehension are fine. I suggest you widen your reading material beyond a partisan publication like the Post - unless you wish to remain oblivious to reality.
        • 5 Years Ago
        *edit : Rassmussen is the only poll that shows Obama with a negative spread, which is approve - disapprove. Fox News also has him below 50% approval, at 49%.
        • 5 Years Ago

        Since you don't know the difference between "to" and "too", I'm guessing that you don't spend a lot of time reading. I'll save you the trouble and summarize the most recent Washington Post poll:

        "Only 20 percent of adults identify themselves as Republicans"

        In the same poll, 57% approve of Obama's performance as President.

        Good luck with those mid-term elections.

      • 5 Years Ago
      so someone drove a car, on dirt, at the rev limiter. I am not sure what the story is there.
        • 5 Years Ago
        I thought it was just me for a moment there.
      • 5 Years Ago
      "Ferrarri Refutes the Decline of the West" and "Holidays in Hell" are some of the best satire in America.
        • 5 Years Ago
        Seriously, "Ferrari refutes..." is hilarious.

        "Only God can make a tree, but only man can drive by
        one that fast. And if the lowly Italians, the lamest, silliest,
        least stable of our NATO allies, can build a machine like this,
        just think what it is that we can do. We can smash the atom.
        We can cure polio. We can fly to the moon if we like. There
        is nothing we can’t do."
      • 5 Years Ago
      Lay off the haterade, folks. This is much less dangerous to a car than driving it on Boston roads, and I'm sure the exhaust note was sweet. Namaste, brother hoon.
      • 5 Years Ago
      I think I might cry in front of everyone in this computer lab :(

      This is why rednecks and import cars should NEVER mix!
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