You're totally rich, your name's on several buildings and your wife is hotter than three suns. And you love sporty driving -- no chauffeur for you. Thing is, people are always shooting at your Ferrari 599. True, it can outrun bullets -- but what if you're stopped at a light? BMW has a solution for you. Meet the 760Li High Security and its "little" brother, the 750Li High Security, two new flagships providing safe haven from attacks and an entertaining steer. And they're fast. The 750Li has the now ubiquitous 4.4-liter twin-turbo V8 good for 407 hp and 443 lb-ft of torque. Even better, is the mighty heart of the 760Li with its soon-to-be shared with Rolls-Royce 6.0-liter twin-turbo V12 that not only makes 537 hp but 553 lb-ft of gravity defying torque. That much grunt lets the big dog hit 60 mph in 6.1 seconds. Both cars are electronically limited to 131 mph.
But here's why you really want 'em. Unlike cars that get all up-armored in the aftermarket, the new 7-Series was designed from the very start with armored versions in mind. Meaning that when the lads at the Dingofling factory add a few thousand pounds of bullet-proof steel plating, BMW has already designed a suitable suspension component (be it dampers, bushings or strut top mounting points) to account for all the extra weight. Moreover, as the new factory panels are in fact a perfect match to the parts they're replacing, the High Security cars fit together better and are more tightly sealed -- good news in case of gas attacks. And speaking of gas attacks, there's an assault alarm that automatically puts out fires under the car and in the engine bay. The assault alarm can also detect excess gas levels and automatically shut the vents, raise the windows, locks the doors and pump in purified air. Gotta have that.
BMW's claiming that both cars meet VR7 levels of protection and that the non-see-through bits meet VR9 levels. Sadly, even the internet doesn't know exactly what those levels mean, but they sound safe. In fact, (taking BMW's word for it) the only safer place on four wheels is Obama's Cadillac One, and even you can't buy that. Says BMW, "The two BMW high security sedans set new standards in the protection of persons at risk while traveling in their vehicle." Still not feeling safe? There's an optional compartment to store two machine guns right in the center console. Plus we're sure some "discreet" BMW consultants could help you and your check book make the 7-Series High Security a whole lot safer. Full press release after the jump.