• Aug 5th 2009 at 10:58AM
  • 13
1958 Wartburg 311 and friend - Click above to watch the video

Don't lie: you've long pined for understated chic that only a late-1950s East German three-cylinder sedan of your very own can provide, but the price has been holding you back. Even in non-running condition, a real, actual Wartburg could set you back between $300-$400. That's some serious scratch these days. Feeling your pain, the fine folks at the 24 Hours of LeMons have got a deal for you.

In what's probably the first ever, and without question the last ever, Win-a-Wartburg contest, all you have to do is write an essay explaining why you deserve such a dignified and exotic crappy-communist pile of rust precision Teutonic machine and the Wartburg is all yours. So what if parts are harder to find than a bride who actually deserves a white dress -- check out all the perks!
  • The winner of the contest gets the lovely blue 1958 Wurtburg 311 pictured above for FREE. No strings, it's yours.
  • The winner picks up his or her very own Wartburg at the Lamest Day this October at Nelson Ledges Road Course in Ohio.
  • If said winner then decides to enter said Wartburg in a LeMons race, their team will be automatically approved, their entry fee will be waived and no matter how hard they decide to cheat, no BS laps will be assessed.
  • Think of how jealous your neighbors will be when this fine piece of European craftsmanship gets trailered onto your lawn parks itself in your driveway.
  • The ability to non-ironically rock a "My Other Car is a Wartburg" bumper sticker on your minivan is priceless. Or is that ironically?
There's one catch -- the winner of the Win-a-Wartburg contest is responsible for hauling the 311 away from Nelson Ledges. Presently, the car isn't running -- but it's probably just out of gas! Oh, and the car's title is, er, missing. Yeah, missing. Essay entries are due by September 1, 2009. Contestants can enter here: The Official Win-a-Wartburg Contest. Educational video demonstrating the Wartburg's full potential after the jump.

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    • 1 Second Ago
      • 6 Years Ago
      I too would rather have the q45.
      • 6 Years Ago
      I found an essay contest!
      What do 'Aloha' and 'Mahalo' mean to you?
      Are you a talented writer? Prove it and your talent could pay off big time. Write an essay of 101 words (or less) and you can win a custom home on the Big Island of Hawaii. You read right - WRITE for a home in paradise. The contest will be judged by community leaders - teachers. AND there will be a $30,000 donation to the local schools that are in need at this time of budget cuts.
      Win/win, no?

      Hurry - Contest Ends August 11, 2009!

      Note to Travel Writers, Travel Agents & Reporters:
      The sponsors of the contest (builders of the home) are offering complimentary nights at their Castle Bed & Breakfast -no strings attached. Call them for details. 714-253-3810. Ask for Sheri.

      On a personal note: These people are well known in their community (for over 8 years) and you can be assured that the contest is being run with the highest integrity. The Prosecuting Attorney's Office is aware of the contest AND the Office of Consumer Affairs has also checked out the contest.
      See an interview on KGMG9 Sunrise Show: http://kgmb9.com/main/content/view/13118/108
      • 6 Years Ago
      I kinda like this car, for some odd reason. I'm actually surprised it isn't any more rusty than it is. It would be an interesting car to fix up and drive around, though with a weak 37hp engine - I can't say it would be all that exhilarating to drive. Definitely unique on this side of the pond, though...
      • 6 Years Ago
      Can I just have the marvelous Q45 in the background of those pictures?

      • 6 Years Ago
      You guys that say the motor should be replaced with a six, BelowPar 318, modern four banger turbo, etc. do not understand two strokes torque and horsepower over their four stroke brothers, and often a two popper is equal to a four stroke of double cylinders/capacity.

      Also, the DDR did use these in many European rallys in the 1960s, with mixed success. They were a continued development of the successful DKW Auto - Union 1000 (Audi) two strokes afterall......
      • 6 Years Ago
      It has the radiator *behind* the engine? That is some strange engineering.
        • 6 Years Ago
        That way it can double as the heater -- duh!
      • 6 Years Ago
      "My Other Car is a WARTburg!"
      • 6 Years Ago
      but would it qualify for cash for clunkers?
      • 6 Years Ago
      Every decent communist era car came with a bevy of optional farm implements. With these uncertain economic times and robust government "investments", the new General Motors should inquire if the Wartburg brand is available for purchase; to replace the retired (executed) Pontiac brand.
        • 6 Years Ago

        No kidding!?

        The United States now owns the, former communist, Wartburg brand? Really?....... So very strange, yet fitting.

        I'm quite certain now that Stephen King has been the mastermind of the world's auto industry for the last twenty years. This couldn't get any more bizarre than it has become. LOL.
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