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Click above for a high-res gallery of the Maserati Gran Turismo.

I've been reading an unhealthy amount of car reviews for more years than I dare to count and I'm guessing you're the same. But over the last decade, I've become increasingly selective about which sources and writers are worthy of fulfilling my fix. Money that should otherwise be stuffed away for a rainy day or put towards replacing the waterpump in my E36 inevitably finds its way into the till of my local bookseller when a new issue of Evo or Car hits the stands. While it still seems that a handful of buff books and a select few newspaper writers have the market cornered on the art of road-going storytelling, one light shines in our little corner of the webiverse.

Motive was smart enough to hire Davey G. Johnson, former Jalop contributor and friend of everyone here at Autoblog, to review the Maserati Gran Turismo, and where Davey goes we follow. He recounts his time in the driver's seat of Maser's grand-tourer, providing further evidence that true automotive verse isn't always found on dead trees. These kind of stories continue to solidify the 'Net's grasp on the future of automotive journalism, proving that the medium doesn't matter – the man behind the keyboard wields the power to inspire. Enjoy.

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    • 1 Second Ago
      • 7 Years Ago
      Exactly, I want to read about the car. Jaguar Cleveland is a Maserati dealer and they had three of these parked outside. I looked the car over for a good half hour. It is one of the best looking cars I have ever seen.

      What I want to know is if it is worth $115k and will it break down every 10,000 miles.
      • 7 Years Ago
      I want to read about the Maserati , this story is for the birdcage.
      • 7 Years Ago
      Writers like him make bloggers like me want to go down to the pub and drown in a scotch-soaked stupor of self-criticism and low self-esteem.
      "Whhhy caaan't I write like thaat!?!?!"

      Possibly the greatest automotive feature I have ever read.
        • 7 Years Ago
        That is perhaps the worst writing I have ever read.
        • 7 Years Ago
        people who say that art is purely subjective are idiots. there may be a thousand ways to skin a cat, but that doesn't mean that absolutely *anything* you do to a cat will end up skinning it; whistling at a cat will most definitely not skin it. in other words, while some questions may not have correct answers, pretty much all questions can be answered incorrectly.

        case in point...
        Q: "hey, so what do you think of the maserati gran turismo?"
        A: "my shrink says i'm too sexy for my pants."

        not a correct answer.

        if i wanted to read something mind-numbingly convoluted and filled with references and allusions that lead to absolutely nowhere, then i'd say his prose fills my needs wonderfully. if i wanted to read a car review--as i did--his prose would be considered trash. which it is.
        • 7 Years Ago
        So he has an imagination and a thesaurus. Waste of time, I think he talked about the car for 1 paragraph.

        Eccentricity for the sake of eccentricity.

        His writing is like a David Lynch movie: conceited and over the top. And don't begin to try to tell me one needs to be intelligent to appreciate that work. It works for some and not for others

        my opinion...
      • 7 Years Ago
      That was one of the worst peices of writing I have had the misfortune of reading. I had to look very hard for any sentences that concerned the car, but they were too few. So I ended up skipping sentences, then paragraphs, and finally the entire article.

      I find the juvenile "txtspk" much more legible than this kind of painfully pretentious attempt at sophistry.

      BTW, the car is good looking, and that's all it has got going for it.
      • 7 Years Ago
      The grill on the Maserati doesn't work for me from the front view for some reason. The trident is a little too large, and the grill slats a little too far apart.

      Otherwise, an outstanding styling job, as one would expect from Maserati.
      • 7 Years Ago
      good review, and i'm with you on EVO and CAR, only two rags I buy anymore. I think C&D last came to my door when i was 15 :D.
      • 7 Years Ago
      I'm trying to find it... but there was, about a year and a half ago, a review of the Lambo LP640 that was about nothing but the car, but was written in such a way that you could smell the leather, hear the engine, and just feel the presence of the Lambo jumping off the page... I need to find it! I think it was Road & Track.
      • 7 Years Ago
      As mentioned above, his writing style is overdone and contrived. To me, that whole thing is just unreadable.
      • 7 Years Ago
      Fantastic Review. Since Gas & fuel prices are in rise now, we need to think of smarter fuel efficient luxry cars as well.
      • 7 Years Ago
      I agree that this is a little more then a self serving, albeit entertaining story about him, with a little about the car. I had a hard keeping up with his euphemisms, metaphors and analogies. There is something beautiful and poetic about being specific and straight to the point with a little humor thrown in for good measure.
      • 7 Years Ago
      Until today, it has been my distinct pleasure to not find it necessary to comment on a single Autoblog post. But today, gentlemen, you've done it.

      To praise Mr. Johnson's article is to praise a piece laced with superfluous modifiers and unnecessary SAT words. Who's to say that Mr. Johnson isn't capable of defining each of these ten-cent gems without the use of a thesaurus? Certainly not those of us who missed the obscure pop-culture references. The man could well be a genius.

      The thing about published writing---perhaps more specifically the reason that pieces like this one are not more common---is that writing is a medium of communication. As such, the purpose of writing is to be understood. Littering one's writing with rare words is not the essence of the art. Artful writing depends upon the combination of many elements, including, but by no means limited to, word choice.

      Although the density of Mr. Johnson's piece is somewhat dizzying, in some respects, the Autoblog staff's reverent admiration for it is even more disconcerting. We live in an ADHD time when difficult words and strange references stymie readership. I would have thought that bloggers, more so than others, might appreciate this. Wry wit and choice words highlight good writing, but Mr. Johnson's writing is entirely high-lit. It is as rich as U-238; it explodes off the screen.

      For all the words that Mr. Johnson does know, he apparently has never come across one important one: pithy. For all its flower, Johnson's writing is neither "terse," nor "succinct." Dictionary.com (a website that one might wager lies buried in Mr. Johnson's web history) defines pithy as meaning, "brief, forceful, and meaningful in expression; full of vigor, substance, or meaning; terse; forcible..." Johnson's writing is certainly full of vigor, but it lacks substance and obscures meaning. If I wanted to be cruel, I would compare it to masturbation.

      A college professor could tell Mr. Johnson to re-read his Strunk and White, but I would advise him to keep a copy of this "GT" article on hand. It will surely come in handy when Ernest Hemingway rises from the dead, ten years hence, when spinning in the grave starts to get old.
      • 7 Years Ago
      @C4IV5: THANK YOU.

      For a second there, I was worried that I was losing my mind. Johnson's writing smacks of self-indulgence and masturbatory word-fiddling. I couldn't have said it better.
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