We've seen some dogface cars around here. As a baseline, most of us consider the stock Pontiac Aztek simply indigestible. With that in mind, when this "customized" Pontiac Aztek showed up on eBay last year, a few of us fell over the porcelain fighting to hold down lunch.
Just as our stomachs have finally settled, we came across several pictures of a limousine in the Ukraine. The manufacturer of this calamity obviously didn't know when to stop (in fact, they apparently didn't know where to start either) as every styling, functional, and ergonomic rule has been tossed out the door. There is so much wrong with this disproportioned mess of machinery...
Don't question the six exhaust tips, the narrow trunk opening, or the running boards that don't exactly line up with the doors. Better yet, spend time pondering the aerodynamic hood bulges for the wiper blades, the old-school benefits of 14-inch wheels, and the envious looks you will get for the lavish ornamentation on the door handles. You know, we didn't see any seat belts inside - then again, would you want to be caught with a heartbeat in this thing?
[Source: English Russia]
Officially Official: New Ferrari California exposed!
Tweaked 2009 Ford Focus Coupe debuts
Subaru Exiga heading to production, teaser leaks out
Racer dies at Altamont 24 Hours of LeMons
VIDEO: Danica Patrick hits crew member on pit lane at Indy
Future Classic: 1984 Chrysler Minivans
Autoline on Autoblog with John McElroy
First Drive: 2009 Volkswagen Jetta Sportwagen
Project Track Slut, Part One: Pick a weapon on the cheap
By the Numbers: April 2008
_thumbnail.jpg "Lamborghini Reventon unboxed in Las Vegas")
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 2)
stealth @ Apr 8th 2008 8:14PM
so fresh & so clean
JZeke @ Apr 9th 2008 1:03AM
In Soviet Russia, my ride pimps YOU!!!
Fatman @ Apr 8th 2008 8:15PM
This is what happens when someone designs an automobile without going to design school. I don't where to start. Well maybe with the excessive front overhang, your turn.
Edward Simpson @ Apr 15th 2008 8:25AM
Fatman, your sentence shows what happens when one does not go to grammar school.
Hamud @ Apr 9th 2008 6:43AM
Never been to a design school, but at the age of 13 I could design cars better than this...
I would be really ashamed of being inside this thing, hahahaahahhaha.
funny as hell @ Apr 8th 2008 8:16PM
HAHAHA
Dave @ Apr 8th 2008 8:24PM
And the evils of the Chernobyl continue to ravage the former Soviet block...
Seriously though, do you think they are hiding ICBM's in that thing? No one would actually ride in it.
tankd0g @ Apr 8th 2008 10:46PM
Oh crap, that's how they are getting them out of the country!
LT-1 SS @ Apr 8th 2008 8:25PM
I WANT ONE!!!
joshuabailey @ Apr 8th 2008 8:29PM
Deeply tasteful and understated.
BowserUSC @ Apr 8th 2008 8:36PM
ahh, this makes me proud of the motherland.
B @ Apr 8th 2008 9:06PM
I love the use of other automotive components. It looked like a steering colum from an Audi, and a Gauge Cluster from a Mk3 VW
Victor @ Apr 9th 2008 2:42AM
Yes, at first glance, it seems like it's based on an Audi 100 C3 platform (AKA, audi 5000)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Audi_100
You see alot of the 3rd gen cars in China.
lUp @ Apr 9th 2008 9:43AM
Actually there are lots of things :)
the taillights are actually 4 taillights, 2 on each side, just mirrored along the horizontal border.
The front lights are also from some ukrainian transporter (called Gazelle i think, quite common over there)
The dashboard is completely of Audi descent, i think. The backseats are Lada i would say (or something of similar comfort)
I don't think someone ordered this "car", it's most likely hand built (like the wooden one some time ago, also from ukraine).
"Tuning" in Ukraine is most of the time applying aftermarket parts, such as fake airscoops, added exhaust pipes (with no actual connection to the engine), LEDs in a quantity, that doesn't come short of a Christmas tree illumination, tinted windows (side and back, sometimes even front), 13" chrome rims... If it's cheap, they get it.
On the other side, there's a big street racing scene, with cars that could be compared to the ones from the 3 installments of "The Fast and The Furious". But they are quite rare, and very seldom on the streets.
Justin C @ Apr 9th 2008 4:12PM
Not to mention the tacky use of ML320 wheels to round out the overall hideousness...
Does anyone else get the feeling the "designers" thought they could combine items from luxury cars to get the feeling they're riding in a high-quality machine? Lol.
SPG @ Apr 8th 2008 9:13PM
Ahh, so this is why people make fun of me for being Ukrainian.
I always wondered.
DMC-12 @ Apr 8th 2008 9:30PM
I think the limos that Top Gear made were better looking, and those were designed by a pianist, a dj, and a journalist.
mikew @ Apr 8th 2008 9:30PM
You can clearly see the Pontiac influence in the grill design! God I hate Pontiac kidney grill and wish they wouldn’t use it across the entire product line. Enough already.
Bri-tittle @ Apr 8th 2008 9:46PM
I bet it's packing a Pontiac V-12, too!
John Starnes @ Apr 8th 2008 10:26PM
Finally....something uglier than the Aztek and the new Focus and Sebring!