A new report from The Onion details a new Department Of Transportation initiative to give reckless drivers their own space on highways, thus freeing them from the drudgery of actually driving. The new lanes will be of a special bowl design to keep cars on the right track while obviating the need for things like steering. Once the national highway system is fully upgraded with these lanes, that impatient meathead with the misaimed headlight won't have to ride your bumper in his pickup anymore. He'll have his own road space, complete with strategically stationed full-service hearses, ramps, padded embankments, and heavy guardrails to keep all those other idiots away from your close-following road compatriot, who's obviously a much more skillful driver.
For those of you that may not be aware: The Onion is satire!

Autoblog accepts vehicle loans from auto manufacturers with a tank of gas and sometimes insurance for the purpose of evaluation and editorial content. Like most of the auto news industry, we also sometimes accept travel, lodging and event access for vehicle drive and news coverage opportunities. Our opinions and criticism remain our own — we do not accept sponsored editorial.

From Our Partners

You May Like
Links by Zergnet
2017 Mercedes-Benz Sprinter 2500
MSRP: $32,495 - $54,390
2015 Honda Civic
MSRP: $18,290 - $26,740
2015 Honda Accord
MSRP: $22,105 - $33,630
2015 Jeep Grand Cherokee
MSRP: $29,995 - $64,895
2018 Volkswagen Atlas
MSRP: $30,500 - $48,490

Questions

There are no questions about this topic.
Be the first to ask!
Share This Photo X