First of all, that's our favorite post title of the year so far. We don't get to write titles like that very often. Secondly, this intruder must be dumber than a bag of rocks or just ill-informed to break into the house of a professional race driver and think he's going to get away. The story goes like this: Franchitti told reporters recently that he was eating cereal one morning in the kitchen of his home in Nashville, Tennessee, when he looked up to find a man standing in front of him. Presumably the man was there to see Franchitti's wife, actress Ashley Judd, and did not expect to find another man scarfing cereal in his boxers. The intruder took off and Franchitti hopped in his car and followed, but he forgot one thing... pants. The 2007 Indianapolis 500 winner proceeded to chase the man in his boxers and a white T-shirt anyway, though police caught up to him first. Local media had already heard about the chase over the police scanners and were on scene to interview the half-dressed vigilante/race car driver, who wisely doled out soundbites from the seat of his car.

Let this be a lesson to all would be Ashley Judd stalkers: Pants be damned, Dario Franchitti will hunt you down.

[Source: Asylum, Photo by Robert Laberge/Getty]